When you want something done, find someone who wants to do it as much as you
How Do-It Together thinking, community-building and collectives are the way we change the world
This is a story about how my mum, a few scribbles on a napkin and a call out on social media led to me pulling off a 16-date UK book tour with zero budget and a bunch of strangers.
It’s about making something from nothing. It’s also a celebration of the fact that all you need is an idea, the drive to make it happen (even if you’re not sure how) and a small army of people who are up for taking the risky, unpredictable and sometimes rollercoaster-y ride with you.
The drama unfolds in a Shoreditch cafe in east London last summer. My mum and I were lunching on bowls of vegan something-or-other before she set off for the airport to fly home. Mum doesn’t live in London anymore so whenever we meet, there’s always at least one BIG what’s-going-on and what-needs-to-be-sorted chat before we part ways. When I visit, these usually take place on her bed; me talking, her pottering or tidying a bookshelf. When she comes to me, we’ll stop for lunch somewhere and still be there sleeves-rolled up wading through the deep-lifey things a couple of hours later.
Its always been this way. I was an only child and mum was a solo parent so it was just us together for a big chunk of my life. Our relationship wasn’t smooth-sailing all the time cos though I was a wonderful kid; I turned into a tricky teen. I reckon we were either gonna be super tight or not in each other’s lives at all - there was never gonna be any room for a middle ground. We’re both love hard or don’t bother types when it comes to the important stuff and we’ve worked bloody hard to get to where we are.
We argued a lot when I was younger, usually over wrong turnings I’d taken that I refused to be helped with. I’d usually end up crawling back when the thing I thought was best hadn’t worked out. That’s what happened when mum took me to my first yoga class after I’d refused to go. I was 16, depressed, starving and throwing up in secret so it was a case of give it a go or die probably. It was also what went down when I was pissed all the time a decade or so later.
Everyone needs at least one cheerleader when they’re trying to get themselves out of hell. It was my mum who was on the other end of the phone in those early cold-turkey days I took into sobriety in 2016. It was my mum who had my back - again over the phone - when I had my heart smashed into a million pieces during the lonely pandemia of Covid in 2020. It was she who reminded me who I was and what I stood for when I was being bullied online because of the critical opinions I’d made public the following year.
This isn’t a love story about my mum (well, maybe it is a little bit); it’s about the strength and power to be found in Sangha. Community is HUGE and really important to me. I didn’t see the value in it when I was younger because I was tangled in my own destructive head, but finding it was what got me out of the wilderness years in the end. And I’ve been looking for it or trying to build it ever since. I’m still looking, even more than I used to since the people closest to me don’t live in the same city as me anymore.
It’s okay, I have friends here but I miss the intimacies and support of having the people I love most nearby to go through the aches and pains and humdrum of daily life with. And my mum (who isn’t in this city either) has been an important part of my sangha and the rest of this community-building story so it made sense to start with her. Also because, while I do everything; the writing, the stuff on socials, the plotting and planning what’s next myself (cos I’m a lone wolf) there’s a pretty special woman whose scraped me off the floor or given me a shove when I’ve needed it. Truth is I owe her most things.
But that doesn't mean I do everything she says.
Not at all.
And this leads us back to that east London cafe.
Canvas Cafe Shoreditch: It’s July; two months since my book was born into the world and I’m getting itchy about what’s next. Mum’s making notes on a napkin with a scratchy biro (cos we’ve always had our best ideas on napkins). She’s saying something about me promoting the book or it’ll disappear and not enough people will know about it. Says I should come up with a kind of workshop series that involves teaching yoga and doing talks about the book to prolong its life.
I’m shaking my head and regressing into that old teenager I used to be. I hate self-promo and selling stuff.
I don’t want to;
I can’t,
it’s not me I say.
We have a mini-tiff, smooth things out and I send her on her way to Gatwick Airport.
A month later - and this is always how I come to things - in my own sweet time. I’m still itchy, antsy; and out of nowhere like lightning bolts in my body, everything crystalizes in a cacophony of epiphanies and I know what I must do.
About two years earlier I’d announced that I believed modern yoga (and it’s so-called “wellness” big sister) was a political issue and needed a revolution. I hadn’t written the book but it was starting to become a handful of ideas in various docs on my laptop at the time. The eventual memoir-meets-polemic that I ended up writing served - in my mind at least - as my personal contribution to that revolution.
But after it was published I was lost. Like something was missing. I found that I missed teaching yoga and as crazy as it sounds, I was lonely without my book. I’d poured parts of my actual heart into it and felt like I’d never get those pieces of myself back. I knew the book didn’t belong to me anymore. It felt disorientating. I had to find a way to find my feet. I realised that I had to meet readers. I wanted us to hang out, shoot the breeze and hatch ideas. That’s how I could bring the book’s spirit and ethos to life.
I posted a video to Instagram telling the internet what I hoped to do and asked if anyone was up for joining me. Kinda what my mum had suggested but with my own spin on it. Then I turned my phone off, threw it in a drawer and panicked.
I paced the bedroom of the flat I was a lodger in at the time for the LONGEST FIVE MINS. I watched school kids loiter outside the window. What if no one responded? My self-esteem would be on the floor. No longer able to resist, I grabbed my phone for a sneaky peak.
I wasn’t prepared for what happened next.
Messages and comments were waiting for me from studio owners who had read the book, others who followed me sent over suggestions of places to contact in their area. It was utterly amazing and I got to work. I said a big YES to everything. Dates were swiftly diarised, a calendar of gigs bought together and a yoga/book Tour of sorts came into shape.
As I write, I’ve visited 16 different communities across the UK for the best part of a year. Everything was organised over phone calls and emails with people I’d never met but were willing to take a chance. I wouldn’t have been able to pull any of it off without them. It’s worth saying that I’d never done anything like this before and learned the logistics of how it was done through doing it. The same way I learned how to write the book by doing that. If you want to do something enough you simply have to find your way as you go along.
It still wows me now when I reflect back on what I and a bunch of people I now call friends did together. And I wanted to create a space to celebrate that. To platform all the independent businesses who joined me for the crazy ride. I gave them all a shout out on my Instagram page after each event but a round-up of them all in one place felt in order as a way to mark the end of the Tour this summer, ahead of new things that lay ahead.
The most significant I learnt through doing all of this is being reminded that where there’s a will there’ll def be a way. And the most exciting and inspiring thing I discovered was that when you realise you can do things alone (and you’re never really alone cos someone will always wanna help), you become an unstoppable force. It’s a good feeling. Liberating. And finally if the person whose been your biggest cheerleader suggests you give something a go, it’s probs worth listening to them. They’ll have a good sense of what you’re made of when you’re filled with doubt.
Finally, if you wanna get something done and don’t think you can do it alone, it’s worth knowing you probably won’t have to. Cos if you do work you believe in the people you’re looking for will find you. And then you can do even bigger things; TOGETHER which is loads better and way more fun : )
The Yoga Manifesto on Tour roll call…
Yoga Point Brixton, London - October 2022
Kicked things off in an old manor of mine (way back in 2009 when I was a local paper reporter and lived in the area). It was the first time I’d taught a full class in a while so wasn’t sure how it would go. Loved every min! We practised, spoke frankly, listened and shared ideas. YPB teacher @yoga.nin was a superstar facilitating questions as things were got off chests, connections made, numbers exchanged and community built. @yogapointbrixton owners Rebecca (back row wearing glasses) and Vaccasin couldn’t have been kinder hosts, making tea, welcoming students and orchestrating the whole thing. YPB is proper solid grassroots work on the ground, our politics are aligned and changes we want to see in the world are the same. I left inspired (and with a belly full of homemade lentil soup) which Rebecca insisted I got down me despite me telling her I was too hyper to eat.
Yoginah, Reading - October 2022
Reading was SO MUCH FUN hosted by Purdy (in green) who had built a really special oasis of peace, practice and togetherness (at the now sadly closed) @yoninah.life. We practised, sweated, folded forwards, sideways, backwards and some even gave headstand a go for the first time. YES! We shared stories, I learnt loads listening to experiences different to mine (inc fascinating insights into yoga in Poland), and felt seen as experiences were reflected back to me that I’ve written about. We also had a MASSIVE laugh (v v important) and I headed back to the train station on a high. Special shout out to @sezansays who put me in touch with Purdy and without whom this event wouldn’t have happened.
Yoga on The Lane, London - November 2022
Check out this lovely lot who braved a cold winter’s eve to practise with me @yogaonthelane on a Friday night! Many had come from far flung parts of the city and even outside London (I see you Chantelle and Lorna) which was just WOW. We practised, breathed, tried new things and discovered some more. We had a MASSIVE LAUGH and I had the bestest time. One of my fave moments was when YOTL owner @naomiyoga (in the mustard jumper) who is the warmest person you could meet; popped outside the studio after our practice and came back with an armful of mugs, kettle and teapot. Such a generous host. I discovered that everyone had read the book at this event which blew me away as we sat in a circle and shared. Naomi’s built a v special place, a safe space filled with LOVE; like a nest and that’s what this whole yoga thing is all about: community and presence, practise and relationship.
Margate Yoga Studio - November 2022
Katya, owner of MYS margate_yoga_studio was the first person to DM me to host an event after that vid I dropped on IG. I was thrilled by her enthusiasm and we got a date in the diary fast. There was so much love when I visited on a rainy Saturday. The studio is a warm spacious enclave tucked away in an unassuming building that used to be a bank. Can’t think of a better indy biz to have moved into a place that’s synonymous with taking and turn it into something that’s focussed on giving back. And how could you ignore this photogenic group of wonderful humans who came out to play from all over Kent and even London. I remember thinking that breathing and practising on rainy days has a spesh ring to it. I guess it’s cos we’re not missing anything mega outside. And when indoors is there really anything better we could be doing than connecting with ourselves and each other? Doubt it. Community and practise; living, learning, growing and moving forwards is everything
Brighton Natural Health Centre - December 2022
This event was DEEP! I knew it would be cos of the life-affirming phone calls I’d had with @brightonnaturalhealthcentre (now sadly closed) manager @laurenphi (in the 🌈 ) ahead of this gig. And of course there was Lou @bodybitsbrighton (second from left) who had read my book, wrote the most heartfelt review and was the reason I ended up in Brighton in the first place. This was a special one for everyone’s presence, for their sharing, cuddling and welcome. It was so needed cos on the train down I started feeling off; wanted to curl into a ball like a hedgehog and hide. Soon as I arrived; my period appeared. I blurted out what was going on as an explainer after getting my words jumbled a couple of times just in case anyone thought I was being weird. Course they didn’t. There was a lot of fragility in the room that day and SO MUCH love too. There was sorrow and loss, heartbreak and grief. But also the joy that holds hands with suffering and how complex and overwhelming and frightening it can be to befriend both; also how liberating. This pic of us in a cuddle pile is a fond memory. I love how connected and comfy we felt to snuggle up despite in many cases having met for the first time. This is what LOVE and LIFE is. Being together, being vulnerable, being present, being honest.
Kula Yoga Bath - December 2022
My visit to @kulayoga_bath turned out to be the whirliest of whirlwind trips. It would have been nice to have had more time there but wasn’t meant to be thanks to technical faults on train lines, delays, cancellations and every other imaginable thing that could have gone wrong in getting me to the west country in the first place. Nothing went to plan that day but everything worked out in the end and that’s all that mattered. Here’s a pic of Anna, Alba and Davina who stayed to practise despite my arriving so late. And Mila (in white), owner of @kulayoga_bath who was v preggers at the time and super chill about a situation that was out of everyone’s hands. Including the train staff probably. All was well cos it ended well.
East of Eden, Walthamstow - January 2023
Had a GLORIOUS afternoon with this lovely group and everyone who joined online to practise @eastofeden17. Owner Abby has put so much love into every detail at this studio (not far from where I went to my first yoga class aged 16 in fact). A big highlight was our circle time and everyone said such kind things about my book. The studio’s cafe manager Christina took care of me so wonderfully too, making us tea and sharing a lovely cake. I had a little-BIG accident during a demo when I jumped back into plank in class and knocked a church candle over spilling wax all over my foot and onto the studio mat. Christina was unfazed as she calmly flaked it off after class when I confessed. The RAIN was our SOUNDTRACK throughout practise stopping at just the right moment: home time, like it knew what to do. As I said in class: no such thing as coincidences. Nature (and our breath and hearts) show us the way. I left these ends decades ago so it felt like a return to the roots of where this whole Mani thing has come over 25 years later. Who knew this is where I’d end up? Life. Never ceases to surprise.
Soul Mates Bristol - February 2023
This was a super cool one cos it all started with a phone call between two women and little else. Hayley (@hayleyates_ @soulmates_bristol ) reached out having read my book. We had no venue and zero budget to cover expenses but reckoned if we sold enough tix we could make it work. Hayley found us a brilliant community space that we could make our own and together after lots of emails, WhatsApps and a meeting of minds over that phone call it looked like we might pull it off. And we did; together with Tom (@thomas_____r) who was an excellent support act: taking care of all-round ops and stepping up as resident event photographer we never knew we needed. Hayley and I LOVED seeing everyone connect and chat. Magic can happen when we come together. This is what my vision for a community-focussed revolution is about. Hashtag PEOPLE POWER FOR THE WIN.
Bad Hand Studio, Bournemouth - March 2023
BOURNEMOUTH was BRILL! I met such a lovely crew and community there created by @nickbainesyoga @badhandstudio. The yoga studio is in a warehouse space alongside @badhandcoffee where the next gen of ninja baristas learn their caff skillz from Luke (in 🍊 hat). It’s such a cool spot and good things are happening there. Had a few twists involving unexpected bus replacements on the way but the arvo more than made up for it. It was a RAD (to use one of Nick’s fave words) day and such profound discussion was had. It’s always good for me to hear what practise means for people outside the London bubble. Spesh shout out to the lovely @nicole_ourluminousminds who linked me up with Nick who as crazy cosmos would have it had just finished reading my book at the time. I instantly liked Nick when we spoke on the phone. Our perspectives and approaches matched. The more I do this stuff the more I want to do it with people already doing the good work.
The Space Burston, Norfolk - March 2023
This was an unusual one as the Yoga Mani and I joined forces with sisters Izzy and Lisa, founders of @thespaceburston to host a Nourishing Spring Day Retreat. A total of 25 students joined us for journaling and chatting, Yin + Nidras from me, sauna-ing and ice-bathing from Tom @saunaboxhq and vegan snacking courtesy of Meg @mpowell_nutrition. We kicked off with a convo about the Mani which led to thoughtful questions and such moving sharing that touched the bottom of my heart. It rained, the sun shone and like magic a rainbow announced itself during practise 🌈. My visit also helped me understand why so many people run away from London to Norfolk! It’s buzzy, writerly, nature-y and not too deep in the actual sticks for solo people like me who adore the wilderness but also need a few people nearby. Plus I got to hang out with my pal Abi @yogaroompodcast the night before so all in all, a love-filled weekend.
Oru Space, London - April 2023
A lovely group came along for practise and to hear me and Oru Space’s @miriamsophieyoga in convo about some off the themes in the Mani. We moved through an Ash-inspired practise before settling into sinky-inny cosy chairs for chai and chats. I always love having convos with readers who share what’s resonated for them. It means the conversations are always fresh, different and it keeps moving ideas forward. Miriam asked such generous questions and said the kindest words about my little book.
Shout outs to Oru’s co-director @booboo_33 for joining us and being our impromptu photographer and @chloe.kimsey.gardner who was the first person at Oru I spoke to when she still worked there and pitched the idea for this too. Also old friends @vasukiguna @aimee.emerson.yoga and @emmaburdonyoga who I hadn’t seen in ages for coming along for the ride. Plus Liz (sitting to my right) who I met for the first time who shared about a big shift that happened for her during practise. Loved hearing about that and felt honoured it happened in a practice I’d led. This is my fave bit: as we find our own way through practise to share parts of the journey together.
The Space Burston, Norfolk - April 2023
Gig 12 saw me return to @thespaceburston with Izzy and Lisa to host another day retreat with Yin + soundbaths + food + friendship. Everyone arrived overwhelmed with life’s demands and seeking spaciousness so it was a pleasure to be part of pushing a giant PAUSE BUTTON. “Take your time because we have all the time” is something I found myself repeating throughout the day and realised how often I feel I myself am running outta time. From what? It’s my silly head making up stories not worth listening to again. Every day I have to decide what to listen to and what to ignore. It’s tiring but also a powerful thing to know we have a choice. What’s spesh about the events we did n Norfolk was that they weren’t escapes from reality. We always ended up talking about what was going on in our lives, the joys and what was working and what wasn’t. I encourage that; I want to know the real deal and it’s amazing how this honesty can form instant bonds. These are the kinds of life-shifting things that can happen when we share about our lives. All in a single arvo. Magic really.
Merchant City Yoga, Glasgow - May 2023
I was born on the 13th so it’s a spesh number for me. Can’t be coincidence that I ended up at @merchantcityyoga (in one of my fav cities) for stop no. 13 on the Do-It-Together Yoga Mani Tour bus. I had such a good time at this one. MCY teacher Nicole and Judi (aka project manager/cheerleader/head of ops and logistics) both took such care of me throughout. We all chatted in the frankest of ways, drank MCY owner Judi’s increds homemade chai, shared stories, ideas and hopes - plus there might have been some swearing (from me) - hey I was in Scotland it’s allowed! I wanted to do these events because I lack community where I live. I wanted to do them too because I love sharing practice and love a chat after even more. I also wanted to do them cos I wanted to see how different yoga communities do things and to learn. Doing-it-together (“it” being life) is at the heart of what the Mani is about. Also cos hyperlocal get-togethers is where profound practise and harmonious living is to be found I think. Away from the froth of corporate studios which create deeply visible barriers to so many communities. As we talked about many of these things ex-offender blokes who one student attending works with came up. She told me the story in the book about my ex-addict biker mate who found solace in Zen might help them see themselves in it snd maybe consider yoga as a tool to help when they otherwise might not. Music to my heart.
Earth and Syke Yoga, Isle of Skye - May 2023
My first time on the Isle of Skye and what a way to spend it! Simo @earthandskyeyoga and his wife Kirsty @isleofskyenaturaldyeco welcomed me into the B n B they run together. We hung out, walked and talked and I shared practises with the local yoga community. Simo wanted to show me what he’s doing and how his community practise yoga closely to what it was intended to be. It was a long way to go but when I’m invited with such warmth I always say yes. For me, coming from life in a maddening capital city I’m quickly reminded when I visit wild places surrounded with all of that earth, sky and water just how much easier deepening one’s practise can be when nature shows us the way. City life - all that concrete and luxury flat developments - feels at odds with where my heart wants to be. I know I’m someone who needs the buzz too tho, distractions make me feel safe. It’s a conundrum. While teaching Simo’s students and others who joined us from the Skye community in the nuts and bolts way I’d say I do, I was transported back to my first class as a student in 1995. Everyone in a sports hall, making shapes, being in body, observing breath. Bit of Ashtanga, bit of Yin, alota Yoga Nidra. It was good. The commercialised form of yoga hasn’t reached Skye and it’s so remote I don’t think it ever will. Let’s hope.
Highland Yoga Collective - Nairn - May 2023
Last stop on the Scottish Tour bus took me to Nairn a lovely peaceful town in The Highlands @highlandyogacollective for a Friday night of practise, tea and chats @thehighlandweigh. It’s laid back and easy in Nairn. I liked it. That said, though it might seem like an assuming place on the surface, there’s a lot going on in this socially conscientiousness town. You wouldn’t know it but I was lucky enough to have Fiona of the @highlandyogacollective whose local knowledge and finger on the pulse filled me in on everything I’d want to know. I met a lovely group of yoga students at HCY and what energy they brought! The start of all classes I teach are all about arriving and settling (as much for me as the students). I never plan where we might go, we get practising and find out. Then as we breathe and move I’m constantly gathering data, reading the room, watching what’s happening for everyone; unravelling what we might do and where we might go. And man, this lot were up for going to their edge. I was so impressed! Fiona is a ledge and what she’s done at HCY is magic. It’s a yoga studio but also social enterprise that’s tirelessly invested in serving Nairn’s local community. I’m inspired by that.
British Wheel of Yoga - North Shields - June 2023
The final, final final stop on the UK Mani Tour bus took me to North Shields near Newcastle (great city btw) to meet this excellent group of yoga teachers and students for a ⭐️ Making Yoga (and practise) More Accessible ⭐️. It was def an energising way to end the Tour. Big ups to BWY Northumberland rep @sallysjbrown (pictured directly behind me) for being chief organiser and getting in touch with me to pull this together. Sally asked great questions to get the convo rolling and everyone joined in with so much passion and enthusiasm to share practise in their communities. I left feeling super buoyed up. One of my fave moments was when Beccy used my book (hardback version) as a yoga block in her reverse triangle pose. MADE MY BLOODY DAY that did. Later it was circle time and great discussion talking about actual practical ways to take action towards making yoga more welcoming and community-focussed (rather than the virtue signalling optical route so many people go down which results in zero impact imo).
And that’s a wrap!
All’s left to way is that, this is where the real magic happens; at grassroots level and in the frontline with each and every one of us who wants to get involved. The revolution of yoga starts in rooms just like these; each a gathering of people who genuinely want to do things differently and know they can by sharing experiences, coming up with ideas and joining forces cos we don’t have to do any of it alone.
The Yoga Mani Tour started as a scrappy idea on a napkin in a cafe and within months it became all of this. It was exciting and insightful, knackering and joyful. It was a mighty good run. And now I’m thinking about the next BIG BIG BIGGER things I’d like to make happen next. And so can you. What do you wanna do? Ask around and find other's who want to do it. too. Grab a napkin and pen… and see where you go.
